A Tender Holiday Reset: 10 Questions for December Self-Care

​I woke up the other day feeling like December just… happened to me. Have you ever felt that way?

Like you blink and suddenly your holiday spirit seems to have deserted you? Well, that was me.

I was tired, overstimulated, a little sad, a little cranky. I felt like the day was getting away from me almost as soon as I got out of bed.

Christmas felt like too much, which is when you know something's wrong.

My mind instantly went into fixing mode...

“Just push through it.”
“Rise above it.”

I tried to pull on my future self like she was a sweater I could magically slip into. (Spoiler: that didn’t work.)

And then I remembered something that (thankfully) changed the whole tone of my morning.

Here's what happened that changed the way I felt that day...
​

I realized that my “job” is not to transcend these moments. It's to be tender with myself while they’re happening.

My first thought was - you mean transcending them is off the table? But then I began to get on board. :)
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Holiday Self-Kindness &
​Giving Up the Fix

Once I was on board, ​I did the thing I always forget to do even though I teach it...

I got my blanket.
Turned on one soft lamp.
Put on comfort music.

And damned if it didn't work! I felt so soothed and comforted. It felt like being held and loved.

And it settled in even more, that we don't get to skip past being human, even during the holidays. And we’re not meant to fix our way into peace.

So I made a commitment to be kinder to myself when I'm out of sorts, or not feeling well. And I wrote out some questions to help me remember that promise as I begin each day.

I've adapted them for the holiday season and I want to share them with you here. And if you're feeling overwhelmed or tender this season, this is for you.

🎄A Christmas-Cozy Reset Ritual

For the moments when the season is a lot...

​(1) Light something warm.

A candle, a strand of tree lights, or a soft lamp.
Remind yourself that you’re safe. That you’re home.

(2) Wrap yourself up like a gift.

Pull on your coziest blanket or cardigan, and take one slow breath as if you’re tucking your heart in for a winter’s rest.

(3) Choose a Christmas kindness.

Give yourself the kind of comfort your December self longs for...

Sip something delightful (tea, cocoa, or spiced cider)

Stand by the lit tree and let the lights breathe with you

Play a soft carol that always brings you back to yourself

When you feel your shoulders soften, you're ready to go back into your day and take the softness with you.

🌲After the Reset

Once you’ve wrapped yourself in warmth, your system opens — to clarity, compassion, and what you truly need.

And that’s when tender questions work best.

These started as questions for myself on a hard morning, but maybe they’ll soften something for you too.

​10 Questions for a Softer December

How can I be kind and sweet with myself today?

What am I feeling right now that deserves a hug?

What would help me feel more held or comforted?

Oh, I’m feeling ___. Do I need blanket time, quiet, tree lights, or something else cozy?

What can I take off my holiday plate so my nervous system can breathe again?

Is there one seasonal worry I can hand over to the divine for now?

What would feel like joy or comfort today?

If I were committed to being tender with myself, what would I do next?

What would future holiday me thank me for doing today?

​Can I accept this moment as it is, and keep myself company inside it?

The Takeaway

​The Christmas season can be so beautiful… and overstimulating.

I could recommend lots of holiday nervous system support but what that really means is pause, and give yourself five minutes to be human whenever you need it. Take back the season so that ​it belongs to you again.

You don’t need to be better for the holidays. You just need to be kinder to the person living them.

Merry Christmas!

Love, Jeanine