Still Fixing the Past
If you're like me, you’ve spent years healing, learning, and doing the inner work. You’ve done so much work. And you’ve done it with courage and devotion—and it’s okay to be tired.
But here’s what you're ready to hear now, or you wouldn't be here. The one who needed fixing was never the real you. She was an illusion that helped you survive until you could remember.
The real you has been here waiting, infinite and whole. She’s not asking to be healed; she’s asking to be known.
So take a breath. You can set the tools down for a moment. You’ve reached the edge of an old map.
From here, your work is no longer repair.
It’s listening. Softening. Letting the divine part of you show you what being the real you actually feels like.
When you got to the place where the old ways stopped working, or didn't work as well as they used to, that’s wasn't failure. Hear me on this - you've done nothing wrong.
But now, you’re ready for the next stage—the sacred stillness of the Void. So when everything in you wants to fix, practice resting instead.
That’s how remembering begins.
Here's a ritual that meets you where you are...
Mini Release Ritual: Let it Go, to Love
Take a deep breath in through your nose, and exhale through your mouth with a long sigh.
As you breathe, imagine every version of you who has tried so hard. The healer, the fixer, the one who just wanted peace — see them standing around you in a circle.
Wrap them up in your love and tenderness and thank them for their devotion, their determination, all the hard work they did to heal, and their commitment to you. Then tell them: "You can rest now.”
Place your hand on your heart. Feel that soft warmth spreading through your chest.
That’s your own compassion meeting you. Let it gather every effort, every old story, and hold it with love.
To deepen this experience, you can light a tealight candle before you begin the ritual, in honor of every version of yourself that diligently walked through the pain of those old stories in order to protect and heal you. Then once you tell them that they can rest, blow it out, releasing all that pain that they've held for you, so that it can be transmuted into peace.
You’ve done so much to heal. Now it’s time to rest and let life meet you halfway.
Over the next few days, I’ll send you notes and soul prompts to help you live from this awareness.
I'm so glad you're here! I believe we knew each other in spirit and agreed to meet in just this way. And I think of the people who wander into my corner of the Internet as friends I haven't yet remembered.
Thanks for keeping our agreement!
Jeanine